So it's been MONTHS since I've blogged. I'd like to play the "I had a baby card" and blame the hectic life of 2 little ones for my lack of writing. But really...it hasn't been as hectic as I expected. Honestly, I am flat out LOVING being a mom of 2. Call me crazy...but I think one was harder than two!
Don't get me wrong. There are new kinds of "hard" with 2 little ones. Even as I try to write this blog post, Baby Ellie is asleep on my lap, I'm reaching over her to type on my lap top, and every once in awhile, I have to pop the pacy back in her mouth so that she doesn't wake up. Before, I wouldn't have dreamed of trying to type a blog post with Marshall asleep on my lap...that would've been too stressful, with me worrying that he'd wake up and feeling too distracted to write. So perhaps you can say...one child introduced chaos and now I've just adjusted to this lifestyle?
Or perhaps...from a spiritual perspective, God has been breaking me down, slowly and graciously helping me let go of my demands for MY time, MY sleep, MY schedule, exactly how I want it. Sleep is all relative now. I used to think that if I didn't get 8 hours, I'd need a nap later that day. Now I'm excited if I get 5 straight hours of sleep without waking up to feed a baby.
As for time, I used to get frustrated by interruptions to whatever I was doing, whether it was email, exercise, or work. Now, I'm happy to get 15 straight minutes alone...which is what I'm going on now as I work on this blog post. My goal is to get this done in one sitting!
But more than anything, I feel that the Lord has shown me the truth of His Word, which reminds us that "children are a gift from the Lord." They are a JOY to watch. I love seeing their personalities emerge. I love being given the task of teaching them (although I feel like God is teaching me even more through them everyday!). I love spending time with them, playing with them, holding them, reading books to them, laughing with them, and yes, even disciplining them, as difficult as it is, I am reminded that this is SO how God sees us. We are His children. He delights in us. He loves us. He laughs with us. He is there for us during the hard times and fun times. He disciplines us, not because He is mean, but because He loves us.
I am so, so, so thankful for the precious phase of life. I've never felt more fulfillment than I do right now, being a stay at home mom. I NEVER thought I would say that! I have sought fulfillment in so many other things...I truly feel like being a mom is the most rewarding job I've ever had! I know I won't feel like this every day, but for now, I just want to praise God for this season of joy. Children are truly a gift from the Lord!